A man was walking along a beach and he found a bottle. He looked around and didn’t see anyone, so he opened it. A genie appeared and thanked the man for letting him out. The genie said, “For your kindness I will grant you one wish, but only one.”The man thought for a minute and said, “I have always wanted to go to Hawaii but have never been able to because I’m afraid of flying and ships make me claustrophobic and ill. So I wish for a road to be built from here to Hawaii.”
The genie thought for a few minutes and said, “No, I don’t think I can do that. Just think of all the work involved with the pilings needed to
hold up the highway and how deep they would have to be to reach the bottom of the ocean. Think of all the pavement that would be needed. No, that is just too much to ask.”
The man thought for a minute and then told the genie, “There is one other thing that I have always wanted. I would like to be able to understand women. What makes them laugh and cry, why are they temperamental, why are they so difficult to get along with? Basically, what makes them tick?”
The genie considered for a few minutes and said, “So…, do you want two lanes or four?”
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Ain’t it the truth, brother!! I will never understand the ways of a woman, but my marriage will not thrive unless I’m willing to try. As comedian, Jeff Allen, puts it, “Happy Wife; Happy Life!”
I think the most difficult part of understanding women is, just when you start to settle in and get the hang of ‘it’, ‘it’ changes. Like most guys, I wanna be able to just put the relationship on cruise control to maintain it. I don’t think about upgrading it, or enhancing it. Oh, but not my wife. She will want us to 
GROW! Do I really have to completely ‘get it’ before I can have a good relationship?
I’ll let you in on a little secret I’ve discovered over the years. I’ve discovered my wife doesn’t need me to solve the problems or the dilemmas she’s facing. She just needs to know I’m interested and with her while she deals with them. She’s plenty competent and capable, and she has been since long before she met me. When she knows I’m tuned in and in her corner, she’s freed up to tackle just about anything.
So here’s the deal. Feel like you need to understand your
wife (or girlfriend) fully in order to be effective with her? Give it up! Wanna know the secret to keeping her happy? Quit trying to figure her out. It’s too exhausting. Instead, when she needs to talk, just take time to listen to her. Listen, and don’t interrupt, correct, or try to fix. Bite your tongue. Nod periodically and make eye contact (quit glancing at the computer!!) while grunting periodically to show you’re tracking with her. She’ll feel understood…, even if you don’t really fully understand. Pretty simple assignment really. Now Man Up and just do it! Remember – Happy Wife; Happy Life!! Oh yeah, by the way, we still have to take out the garbage and fix the leaky faucet!
I’m thinking this journal entry should be printed out by every man reading this and framed immediately. Either that or, after it’s printed, it ought to be placed in a convenient, well-trafficked place at home, i.e. taped on the wall by the tie rack, stuffed in the sock drawer, or on the dashboard of the car (to be read while not driving).
Thanks for the encouragement.